"Real eyes, Realize, Real highs".
Let that sink in for a moment.
Are you comfortable with your circle, your group, your clique? Do you think all of your 'friends' are actually there for you when you need them most? How about when you don't know that you need them? You're alone in your room, dealing with the same old problems that you have to deal with. No one's actually there for you though right? Maybe virtually, with whatsapp and whatnot. But who's actually there for you? It's safe to say that many people will come and go in your life, but the ones who have always had your back will always find a way back to you - even if you haven't spoken for years. Loyalty makes you family in my eyes, nothing else. Who's got you though? What makes you differentiate a friend between someone who's like family? Let's explore this.
A friend. Google states that a friend is a "person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection". In my opinion, a friend is someone who cares for you, doesn't judge you for your past and believes in your future. This is the person you can open up to without feeling like they will criticise you or your situation. They advise you, look after you and want the best for you. Friend's argue and disagree, but those real friends will always come back to you. Always. I promise you this. Realise how I said 'you can open up to' instead of 'you tell them everything'. This is crucial. People like to believe that if you have many friends, they know everything about you. I'm blessed to have many good friends, but that doesn't mean they must know absolutely everything about me, does it? We all need to have boundaries when it comes to opening up. Okay, cool, you want to tell someone everything about yourself, your past problems etc, fine. Don't expect everyone else to though. I'll elaborate:
I don't know if this is me personally or if it's an actual huge percentage of us, but I do not like speaking about my personal private life too much, to the point where it's always a topic of discussion. We all have our own lives to uphold and maintain, and some aspects need to be done in private... by ourselves. Your friends do not have to know every single detail about your life - and that's completely okay. Don't think you're being a bad 'friend' if you take more time to open up to someone or don't open up to them about certain aspects of your life. It's your life. I don't think anyone is obliged to force information out of you with the excuse of them being a 'friend'. That just doesn't make sense.
And if you are one of those individuals thinking right now, "well I should know everything that goes on in my friends life", then please get rid of this thought. I agree that we should know specific information about our friends, specific issues and/or situations that affect our friends present or future, but damn - give them some space. Let them open up to you in their own time and do not force anything. My point is this: if what I have to say affects our friendship, my happiness, your happiness or our future, I will tell you. If it's not relevant to you or to our friendship, why must you know? I'm going slightly off topic but I really did have to get that off my chest.
Familia. These 'friends' do not even come under the category of friends because they are so much more, end of story. They know you inside out because you've connected with them on a stronger and deeper level. They're loyal and will be the first ones you call whenever you are in a bad situation. Friends care about your future, but family makes sure you attain this future, with them in it. Friends care for you but family makes you their priority. Friends won't judge you but family will keep it real with you and will tell you straight up what's on their mind. You need family in your life. Blood does not determine this bond.
It's so important to have at least one of these types of people in your lives. It's like a necessity. One thing I will tell you all though, do not waste your time with certain people. If you haven't already, watch my video below where I go into a bit more depth about people being 'idiots'. If you've already seen this, carry on reading.
"From 16 to 22, you meet a lot of temporary people". Friends grow apart sometimes. You'll catch yourself praying to God to remove those who are bad for you, and you'll slowly but surely see your circle decreasing. The question is, have they been removed from your life because they're 'bad' for you, or have you been removed from their lives because you're bad for them? Interesting how this friendship thing works, right?
I'll conclude with this: you are important. You were born to be loved and spread love. Do not let criticisms from others get to your heart and focus on who's actually got you - they are the only people you need. I remember when I was much younger, I believed that I genuinely had 30 friends, when in reality, most of them never had my back. I'm growing up and so are you. Realise who's down for you. You'll think that you have everyone's best interest at heart but guess what? Life has a funny way of making you realise that most people are not good for you and you are not good for them.
Your time on this earth is limited. Focus on yourself, your dreams, ambitions and legacy. Don't waste it on people who will never appreciate you. Thank you for reading.
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SALUTATIONS x
